Easter: The Truth is Out There

4 04 2010

And Easter here again, a time for the blind to see
Easter, surely now can all of your hearts be free

Taken from the song ‘Easter’ by Marillion

This is the bit of the Bible that often gets overlooked at this time of year, mainly because the powers that be are fearful of us knowing the truth. Or at the very least because nobody buys them any gifts.


Following the execution of Jesus Christ on the Friday there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth, mainly from the disciples who hadn’t been devious enough to turn him in for money.

But on the Sunday after the public crucifixion, it was noticed that the entrance to the cave where his body lay had been disturbed and fearful that there had been a desecration of the corpse, Mary Magdalene decided to take a look. She was quite surprised that the body had vanished but was even more taken aback when she left the cave and found him sitting outside, enjoying the sunshine. Jesus then turned to her and said :

Go tell my disciples that I have been resurrected and that soon I will ascend into heaven. Do not be sad as this miracle should be celebrated and will be known as Easter. And I wish this to be marked with the giving of chocolate eggs which must be distributed by a rabbit (or failing that a kangaroo). So bring me the disciple known as Cadbury so that I may share these glad tidings with him and announce to the believers the beginnings of a new time of celebration. And get me a kite so that the symbolism of ascension can be marked in a fun way.”

So Mary hurried to the market and found the purveyor of sweets and cocoa, and told him of the Lord’s wishes. And Cadbury raised his eyes to the heavens, saying “blessed be the Lord for his wisdom reaches beyond the grave, we shall ensure that the festival of Easter be celebrated with the mass production of chocolate and the eating of buns. Don’t really know where the bunny fits in but whom I am to dispute the word of the Lord.”

And that is why we now can’t move from February onwards without being assaulted by the sight of hundreds of easter eggs and why those who live in Bermuda make kites to be flown on Good Friday.





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